My roommate's boyfriend basically lives here rent-free and I finally said something.
By @colekindof · Who's in the Wrong
He's here 6 nights a week, uses all our stuff, and eats our food. My roommate thinks since he's 'just a guest' I shouldn't be complaining about it, but his presence is making our bills go up.
The full story
so this is kinda awkward but i need to know if i’m in the wrong. i (20f) live in a two-bedroom apartment near campus with my roommate (21f). we’ve been friends for a while and living together was fine for the first year. but about four months ago she got a new boyfriend (22m). and he just never leaves. like, literally. he’s here when i go to class in the morning, he’s here when i get back, he's here on weekends. i think he's stayed at his own place maybe four times in the last two months. he has his own apartment with his own roommates, so it's not like he has nowhere else to go. at first i didn’t care, whatever, new relationship energy i get it. but it's becoming a huge issue. he showers here every day, does his laundry here, uses my expensive shampoo (i know he does, i bought a specific kind and it's half gone), and eats the food that *i* buy. last week i bought a bunch of snacks for finals and came home to find him and his friend finishing the last of my chips while playing my nintendo switch. the utilities bill has gone up like $40 a month since he started basically living here. i brought this up to my roommate, gently. i suggested that maybe if he's going to be here this often, he could chip in like $50 a month for utilities and groceries. she absolutely lost it. she said i was being greedy and inhospitable, that he's a guest in our home, and that i can't 'charge' her boyfriend rent. she said she pays her half of the rent and that's all that matters. i told her that's not all that matters when her 'guest' is costing me money and making me feel like a stranger in my own apartment. now it's super tense and she's barely speaking to me. am i cooked for this??
How people voted
- Totally Cooked — 28% (74 votes)
- It’s Complicated — 47% (124 votes)
- You’re Fine — 24% (64 votes)
Readers say “It’s Complicated” (47%) — 262 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@sloane — What does your lease say about long-term guests?
@masonkinda — cooked.
@ivyagain — wow a 'guest' who runs up bills and eats your food. where can i get one of those.
@ashactually — I'd start hiding my food and taking my shampoo into my room with me. Maybe start walking around the apartment in your underwear when he's there too.
@avaok — Oh sweetie, you are NOT in the wrong. You're being more than reasonable, and it's not fair for you to feel uncomfortable in your own home.
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