My friend is trying to charge an 'organizer fee' for planning our group vacation.
By @ivyyk · Friends
We're going to a lake house for a weekend and she booked the Airbnb. Now she's dropped a spreadsheet in the group chat that includes a line item for her "emotional labor and administrative services." I am not kidding.
The full story
So there are six of us, and for once we all managed to agree on a free weekend. My one friend, let's call her the Project Manager, jumped at the chance to organize. We were all thrilled. "Great, thanks so much!" we said. We should've known when she created a separate group chat called "Lake Trip Logistics Q3." Last night, she drops a a place nearby Sheet into the chat. It is a work of art, I'll give her that. It's color-coded, has everyone's names, and columns for what we owe. She has broken down the cost of the Airbnb per person, per night. She's included a pre-calculated budget for "shared food and beverage resources." There's also a $100 "house contingency fund" which I can only assume is for if a rogue bear demands a cash payout. And then I see it. At the bottom. A line item called "Admin & Planning Services." She is charging each of the other five of us a $50 fee. So she's trying to make $250 for booking a rental and sending some texts. The chat went dead silent for a full hour. Then my other friend just replied with "???". The Project Manager immediately gets defensive. She starts talking about the hours of research she did, how she had to compare ten different properties, read all the reviews, and coordinate between everyone's schedules. You know, all the things a friend just... does when planning a trip with friends? Now the group is weird. One friend texted me privately saying it's insane. Another is saying we should just pay her the $50 to avoid the drama because she *did* do the work. I'm on the verge of responding to the main chat "Do you take Venmo or American Express for these 'services'?" This isn't a business transaction. Or is it? I feel like I'm taking crazy pills. The trip is next month and I feel like it's going to be the most awkward weekend of my life.
How people voted
- OP Is Right — 31% (61 votes)
- Both Messy — 40% (80 votes)
- OP Is Wrong — 29% (57 votes)
Readers are split: “Both Messy” leads with 40% — 198 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@forrealthough — I would 100% ask for an itemized invoice of her 'hours' and then tell her you'll need to issue a 1099 for the payment.
@whateverman — You are being far more gracious about this than I would be. That is not something you do to friends, period.
@maraagain — She's just putting a value on her emotional labor and setting a boundary; you either respect it or you don't.
@niahm — My old college roommate tried to do this for organizing our housewarming party. We all just ignored that line item on the bill and paid for the food lol.
@quinnyy — omg just pay it this is amazing
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