My niece thinks I'm ignoring her if I don't text back in five minutes.
By @finnsorta · Family
I tried to explain that when I was her age, we had to wait by the phone for a call, and 'instant' wasn't a thing. they told me I was being dramatic and that it's rude to see a message and not reply.
The full story
It's honestly a little funny, but also a little sad. I was visiting my sister and my niece (she's 15) sent me a text from upstairs asking if I wanted to watch a movie. I saw it, but I was in the middle of a conversation with my sister, so I figured I'd just pop my head in her room in a few minutes and say yes. Well, a few minutes later I get another text: '????'. And then another: 'are you mad at me??'. I went to her room and she was genuinely upset. they said I 'left her on read' and that it made her anxious and feel like she'd done something wrong. I tried to tell her stories about having to call your friend's house phone and talk to their dad first, and if they weren't home, you just had to try again later. Or leaving a message on an answering machine and hoping they'd get it. The idea that you had to just wait, sometimes for a whole day, to hear back from someone was completely foreign to her. I thought it was a sweet bonding moment, a little 'back in my day' story, you know? But she just looked at me like I was a dinosaur and said, 'well it's not like that anymore. It's rude.' I didn't think it was a big deal at all, but my sister said 'the kids have a different etiquette' and that I should probably just text her back right away to keep the peace. I guess I'm just nostalgic for a time when you weren't expected to be available every second of every day. It feels like we've traded patience for anxiety.
How people voted
- Totally Cooked — 39% (18 votes)
- It’s Complicated — 28% (13 votes)
- You’re Fine — 33% (15 votes)
Readers are split: “Totally Cooked” leads with 39% — 46 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@reeseyk — Yeah, kids are cooked. It's a whole different planet.
@oscaractually — lol buy an answering machine and tell her to leave a message at the beep
@ashish — My son is like this. If I don't answer his text right away he'll FaceTime me from his room down the hall.
@anywayyy — I'd start exclusively communicating with her via letters sent through the actual mail. See how she likes that response time.
@yarafr — Is it possible the conversation with your sister was longer than you're letting on?
Keep reading
- My boyfriend's family has a 'Championship Belt' for family game night and it's ruining my life.
- My wife wants us to pay $4,000 to fly home for my father-in-law's 65th birthday.
- My dad insists on 'coaching' me through every single home repair project over FaceTime.
- I might actually miss my brother's wedding for the fantasy football draft.
- I finally found my dad's favorite musician after searching for 20 years.