My dad insists on 'coaching' me through every single home repair project over FaceTime.
By @maey · Family
I'm 31 and live by myself. Anytime I mention a small problem, like a leaky faucet or a squeaky door, he demands I call him so he can watch me fix it. He gets genuinely angry if I just hire someone.
The full story
I bought my first house about a year ago, and I'm not super handy. My dad is an engineer and can fix anything, which is great, but he lives five hours away. Every time I mention a minor issue, it turns into a whole thing. He'll say, 'Don't you dare call a plumber, we can fix that.' Then I have to spend my weekend propping up my phone in the bathroom while he dictates every step. The last time this happened was with a running toilet. I spent two hours getting yelled at over FaceTime, only for it to still be broken. I ended up calling a plumber the next day anyway, and he fixed it in 15 minutes. When my dad found out, he was legitimately hurt and said I wasted money and don't trust him. He means well, and I know he's trying to save me money and teach me things, but these calls are incredibly stressful. It always ends with me being frustrated and him being disappointed. I think it would be better for our relationship if I just paid a professional, but he sees it as a rejection.
How people voted
- OP Is Right — 34% (13 votes)
- Both Messy — 42% (16 votes)
- OP Is Wrong — 24% (9 votes)
Readers are split: “Both Messy” leads with 42% — 38 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@noelok2 — soft.
@jaredkk — My father in law tried to teach me how to change my oil over the phone and I ended up flooding his garage with canola oil. Never again.
@violettbh — tell him you hired someone but secretly fix it yourself
@wesmaybe — I wonder if you're accidentally making the problems sound smaller than they are when you first mention them.
@vinceish — Next time just hire the person and send your dad the bill for your therapy.
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