My husband wants our 11-year-old to pay us back for his travel soccer fees.

By @ashyy · Family

they says it will teach him financial responsibility, but I think it's ridiculous. The fees are over $800 for the season and now our son is stressed out trying to figure out how to 'earn' it back from us.

The full story

I feel like I'm going crazy here. My husband and I are usually on the same page with parenting but this has been a real sticking point. Our son (he's 11) made the travel soccer team this year, which is great! We're so proud of him. The problem is the fees are pretty steep—over $800 when you factor in the uniform, tournament costs, etc. My husband thinks it's the perfect opportunity to teach him a lesson about money and responsibility. His proposal is that we pay the fees upfront, but our son has to create a 'payment plan' to pay us back over the course of the season. He can earn money by doing extra chores beyond his normal weekly ones (like, deep cleaning the garage, washing the cars, stuff like that) and with his birthday money. My husband grew up in a household where he had to work for everything, and he's convinced this will build character. I'm completely against it. He's a kid! All the other boys on the team are just excited to play, and my son is now having anxiety about owing us this huge amount of money. He should be focused on school and soccer, not on whether cleaning the gutters will cover his 'debt' to us. I think it puts a weird, transactional strain on our relationship with him. I feel like this is just a normal cost of parenting a kid with a hobby they're passionate about, not a loan that needs to be repaid. We can afford the fees, that's not the issue. It's just the principle of the thing. My husband is holding firm and saying I'm coddling him.

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