I still cringe thinking about the wedding gift my wife and I gave my cousin back in 1988.

By @reesemaybe · Family

We were young, didn't have much money, and gave them a full set of Tupperware. At the time it felt like a genuinely useful, solid present that would last forever. Now, I see what people give at weddings and I feel like we committed a major crime.

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It was my favorite cousin's wedding, a big deal in our family. My wife and I had just bought our first house, so money was tighter than tight. We probably had about $50 total to spend on a gift, which even in 1988 wasn't a fortune, but it wasn't nothing either. We spent a week debating it. We wanted to give something practical, something that would genuinely help them start their new life together. So we went to a Tupperware party my wife's friend was hosting and bought a huge collection—the classic sheer containers with the colorful lids, the salt and pepper shakers, the lettuce crisper, the whole nine yards. It felt so responsible and adult. This stuff had a lifetime warranty! It was an investment! I'll never forget the look on my cousin's face when she opened it at the gift-opening brunch the next day. She was sitting at a table piled high with boxes from fancy department stores—crystal glasses, china, silver platters. And then she gets to our big box. She pulled out the first container and just said, "...Oh! Tupperware. How... practical!" She tried to be gracious, she really did. But you could see the confusion. Her new mother-in-law, a woman who definitely cared about appearances, just gave this tight little smile. At the time, I just felt a little awkward, but I didn't fully get it. It wasn't until years later, attending other weddings and then seeing what my own kids were expected to give, that the full mortification set in. People give hundreds, sometimes thousands of dollars in cash. Registries have blenders that cost more than my first car payment. And I gave my favorite cousin plastic food containers. I see them at holidays and I wonder if they still talk about it. They were probably using them for leftovers for 20 years, but I bet they were laughing at us the whole time.

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