I started packing my own food for family gatherings because the 'potluck' is always a mess.

By @kiralately · Family

We do these big family potlucks, and it used to be a point of pride. Now, it seems like only a few of us actually try, while others bring a bag of chips or nothing at all and still eat a full meal. My sister says it's rude for me to bring a separate container of food just for myself.

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I'm not sure when the shift happened, but our family potlucks have gone so downhill. It used to be this fun thing where everyone would show off a dish they made. My aunts would bring these incredible casseroles, my uncle did a brisket, and I always made a popular dessert. Now, it's a free-for-all. Last few times, it's been me, my mom, and maybe one cousin who bring actual homemade food. Everyone else either brings something super low-effort, like a small bag of chips or a 2-liter of soda for a party of 30, or they just show up empty-handed. But they're first in line to load up their plates with the food we spent time and money on. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth, literally and figuratively, because there's often not enough of the good stuff to go around for the people who actually contributed. So for the last get-together, I just... opted out. I brought a container with a sandwich and some pasta salad just for me. My sister saw me eating and got offended, saying I was 'making a statement' and being antisocial and petty. they said I was breaking with family tradition. I feel like *they* broke the tradition by stopping their contributions.

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