I might skip my best friend's wedding because of what she expects me to pay for her bachelorette party.
By @fayewelp · Was I Wrong
I'm the maid of honor for my best friend of 10 years. The bachelorette party she and the other bridesmaids planned is a five-day trip to Miami that's going to cost almost $2,000 per person, and I just can't afford it.
The full story
My best friend got engaged a few months ago and asked me to be her maid of honor. Obviously I said yes. Everything was fine until the bachelorette party planning started. She, along with the three other bridesmaids, decided on a 5-day trip to Miami. When the finalized budget came out, my share was just under $2,000 after flights, the rental house, food, and everything else they want to do. I told her gently that this was way out of my budget. I'm a teacher, and I just don't have that kind of money to drop on a party, especially with the wedding itself coming up. I suggested maybe a more low-key weekend somewhere closer, or that I could just sit this one event out. She got really quiet and said that as the maid of honor, my attendance wasn't optional and that I've had months to save. The other bridesmaids are siding with her, saying I'm making it awkward and being unsupportive. Now she's barely speaking to me and I'm honestly so hurt and stressed that I'm considering backing out of the wedding altogether. Am I crazy for thinking this is a ridiculous expectation?
How people voted
- Totally Cooked — 29% (38 votes)
- It’s Complicated — 32% (42 votes)
- You’re Fine — 39% (52 votes)
Readers are split: “You’re Fine” leads with 39% — 132 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@sagemm — I feel like being the maid of honor for ten years means there might be more history here than just the party budget.
@colemaybe — go to miami this is gonna be so funny
@guslol — A true friend would never want you to go into debt for a party. I'm sorry she's putting you in this position.
@willsorta — Your friend is showing some serious financial entitlement and it's not your job to fix that for her.
@piakindof — I'd 'get sick' the day of the bachelorette flight and then post pictures of all the fun, cheap things I did at home that weekend.
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