Apparently, having a 'no kids' wedding makes me a monster.
By @yaramm · Family
My fiancé and I were very clear on the invitations: no children. Now my cousin is trying to guilt trip me into making an exception for her toddler and has gotten my aunt involved.
The full story
Everything for my wedding was going so smoothly. My fiancé and I found the perfect venue, we booked our dream photographer, everything felt... easy. Too easy. We both have big families and lots of friends, so to keep the costs and the general chaos down, we decided on a firm but polite 'no kids' rule. It was on the details card of our invitation: 'While we love your little ones, this will be an adults-only celebration. We hope you can enjoy a date night on us!' Most people were totally cool with it. Some even texted me saying they were excited for a night off. And then, the email from my cousin landed. Not a text, an email. It was super formal. After congratulating us, she asked what the meal options would be for her 3-year-old son. I was a little thrown but replied politely, reminding her that it was an adults-only event and we couldn't accommodate children, but we were so excited to celebrate with her and her husband. I thought that would be the end of it. Nope. they wrote back, 'I just assumed that didn't apply to immediate family. He's so well-behaved, you wouldn't even know he's there. It's just really difficult for us to find a sitter we trust for a whole evening.' I stood my ground and explained that the venue has a strict capacity and we've already had other family members with kids make arrangements. Her response? Radio silence. Until an hour later when my phone rings. It's my aunt (her mom), telling me she can't believe I'm putting my cousin in such a difficult position and that 'family should be the exception.' She said I was being selfish and that I would regret 'tearing the family apart' over something so minor. My fiancé says we just have to hold firm, but am I the villain here? It was supposed to be one simple rule, not a dramatic loyalty test.
How people voted
- OP Is Right — 29% (42 votes)
- Both Messy — 41% (59 votes)
- OP Is Wrong — 30% (43 votes)
Readers say “Both Messy” (41%) — 144 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@gusmaybe — Why do guests feel entitled to edit the host's invitation?
@eli — Something tells me this cousin has a history of thinking the rules don't apply to her.
@danny — L behavior from the cousin.
@remylately — I'd show up to the next family event with a printed definition of 'adults-only.'
@colehm — you should make an exception but only for her and then watch everyone else get mad
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