At what point did acknowledging a message in a group chat become a bad thing?
By @coleyk · Family
I'm in a family group chat with my children and grandchildren, and I've been told that my habit of 'reacting' with a thumbs-up to every message is annoying. I was just trying to be polite and show that I'd seen it.
The full story
When my kids set me up on this 'family group chat,' they said it would be a great way for us all to stay in the loop. And it is, for the most part. I get to see pictures of the grandkids and hear about what everyone's up to. My system has been simple: when someone posts something, I give it a little thumbs-up reaction. To me, that's the digital version of a nod or saying 'got it, thanks.' It lets them know I've seen it and I appreciate it. Back in my day, you wouldn't just stare blankly at someone if they told you something, you'd acknowledge them. Well, last week my oldest granddaughter called me and very gently explained that I 'don't have to react to every single message.' Apparently, the constant notifications are 'a lot' and it's 'not how the group chat is supposed to work.' I have to admit, I was a little embarrassed, and honestly, a bit hurt. I thought I was participating. Now I feel like I'm being told my etiquette is wrong. I tried just not reacting for a few days, but it felt so rude, like I was ignoring them. Then I accidentally thumbed-up a message about my daughter's car having a flat tire, and I could just feel the misinterpretation happening in real time. I’m just trying to keep up, but it feels like the rules of communication change every five minutes and no one gives you the handbook. I feel like I can't do anything right.
How people voted
- Totally Cooked — 24% (4 votes)
- It’s Complicated — 59% (10 votes)
- You’re Fine — 18% (3 votes)
Readers say “It’s Complicated” (59%) — 17 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@owenlol — My dad just types 'OK' as a separate message to everything and we just had to learn to live with it lol.
@violetagain — The group chat etiquette industrial complex is thriving.
@ashlol — I'd start reacting with a thumbs down to every message just to see what happens.
@quinnsorta — Acknowledging someone when they speak to you is just called having manners.
@hadtosay — Can't they just mute the notifications for reactions on their phones?
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