My coworkers made a group chat without me to complain about me.
By @edieish · Work
I sit near them so I can hear their phones buzzing at the same time. The other day I heard one of them get a notification and then they all looked over at me.
The full story
I'm a quiet person. I do my work, I don't really join in on the office gossip, and I eat lunch at my desk. I'm not unfriendly, I just prefer to keep to myself. I figured my coworkers just thought I was shy and left me to it, which was fine by me. But lately it's gotten weird. All the people on my team who sit near me will suddenly go quiet when I walk up. A few times I've seen one of them typing on their phone and then suddenly all the others pick up their phones. Yesterday, my boss asked me to stay late for a project. I walked back to my desk and all five of them were huddled around a computer, and they all jumped when they saw me and scattered. It's really starting to feel like I'm in high school again. The paranoia is getting to me. I'm not sure if I should just ask one of them what's going on, or if that will just make it worse. I don't really want to be friends with them, but I also don't want to be actively disliked or seen as the office weirdo.
How people voted
- On their side — 29% (26 votes)
- Both sides — 42% (37 votes)
- Other side — 29% (26 votes)
Readers say “Both sides” (42%) — 89 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@alsofine — Soft.
@reeselately — I'd start talking to myself out loud just to give them some new material for the chat.
@yara — walk up and ask to be added to the group chat
@yepokay — That's a textbook hostile work environment and you need to go to HR immediately.
@theo — Are we sure they're talking about you, or are you just making yourself the main character?