My coworker is treating our team’s shared snack fund like his personal grocery store.
By @ashlol · Work
We started a voluntary snack fund for our team, and one guy is single-handedly draining it by taking full boxes of things home for his personal use. Now HR is involved because he feels 'targeted' for his snack habits.
The full story
I work on a relatively small team of about eight people, and a few months ago, someone had the bright idea to start a communal snack fund. The idea was simple: everyone voluntarily chips in $15 a month, and one person does a big the store run for coffee, drinks, and snacks for the team to share. For the first two months, it was perfect. The breakroom cabinet was a little slice of heaven. Enter my coworker. Let's call him 'the locust.' At first, it was subtle. He'd grab a couple of granola bars on his way out. Fine. Then he started taking entire sleeves of Oreos back to his desk. A week later, he'd be taking a whole box of Cheez-Its home on a Friday, claiming he needed 'weekend fuel.' People started murmuring, and the fund, which was supposed to last a full month, was empty by week three. The person managing the fund sent a gentle, all-team email saying, 'Hey team, let's be mindful of consumption to make sure the snacks last!' The locust replied to the email with a single thumbs-up emoji... and then proceeded to take the last two family-sized bags of pistachios, which were the most expensive item on the shopping list. Yesterday, the fund manager asked if I, being his deskmate, could have a quiet word with him. I tried to be as diplomatic as possible. I said, 'Hey, we’re just trying to re-budget the snack fund and want to get a sense of what items go fastest.' He immediately got defensive and told me he has a 'high-performance metabolism' and that his $15 entitles him to his share, which he calculates by volume, not item count. He then actually accused the rest of us of 'rationing' his essential 'work fuel.' This morning, I woke up to an email from HR, with my manager cc'd. The subject line: 'Mediated Discussion Regarding Team Resource Allocation.' The locust filed a formal complaint, complete with a spreadsheet he made estimating his 'caloric needs' and how the team's 'snack policing' is creating a hostile environment. The snack fund is now suspended, and we have a mandatory team meeting about it next week. All I wanted was the occasional Goldfish cracker, not a federal investigation.
How people voted
- Totally Cooked — 15% (3 votes)
- It’s Complicated — 60% (12 votes)
- You’re Fine — 25% (5 votes)
Readers say “It’s Complicated” (60%) — 20 votes and 5 comments so far.
What people are saying
@lowkeyawkward — You get paid to work, not to sit around eating pistachios all day.
@inesfr — bruh
@zaneforsure — I would start a new, secret snack fund and passive-aggressively offer him a single goldfish from my personal stash every day.
@gabeyk — the spreadsheet to justify his caloric needs is iconic tbh
@softnomaybe — Are we sure he's not struggling financially and this is the only way he feels comfortable getting food?
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